secret sneeky-face santa

As some of you may know, our little family was "secret santa-ed" this year. I was out finishing up some errands before heading out to DC, and T was home, W was asleep. And I get a call.

"Honey, there is a bag on the front porch. I think someone is doing the 12 days of Christmas."

"Well, go see what it is," I respond.

"Okay, it looks like, gosh, a really big bag. And there are presents. A lot of presents!" he says.

So, I get home from errands. T cannot wait to open them. We let W open his the next day. They were very nice. The one for me was perfect, the one for T was hilarious (more on that)*, and W's were great. And we LOVE our joint present (a dinner out at our favorite place. I won't say where it is because then I won't be able to keep all the suspects clear-- see 2 paragraphs down if that sentence does not make sense).

T and I are very grateful. HOWEVER, I guess it must be told that I am really horrible with surprises and secrets and probably all things that start with the letter S (consider my track record previously stated). When I was in college, a boy sent my apartment a dozen roses on Valentine's Day. I called the company they were sent through until someone told me who sent them. It was more than one phone call. I tell people what present I got them WAY before I give it to them, and even when T proposed, I was trying to launch a covert operation to find out if it was happening that night.

All conversations I have had about ANYTHING were running through my head. Who had we told our favorite restaurant to? (LOTS of suspects there). Who knew I was leaving town early to go to DC? (EVEN more are added to the list). Who had been in our house and seen my job chart for me and T? (I did call one friend and tell her she had to be honest and tell me if she was near my house at that point. She wasn't.) But even more than those conversations, I was thinking about the ones I had involving the economy, how much it was going to cost for us to go to DC for the holidays (and my sister's wedding), the problems we had been having at our place, how T and I were not doing presents for each other this year..... those were the ones I was thinking about. And I was horrified.

Did I give someone the impression that we are destitute? That we needed someone else's generosity to save our Christmas? Could my discussions have not seemed like that at all, but complaining and decrying the sad state of our lives? T and I are happy and frugal and loving it. While working in finance, I saw how lots of Americans put Christmas on credit, and that is something T and I will never do. Also, not getting "stuff" is okay with us. Those are the ideals and the thought processes we have ingrained in our marriage.

I can think of so many others that needed this more than we did. I'm grateful for it, it was so nice, but I really want to be able to say, "Thank-you." I LIKE to be able to thank people.

So, WHOEVER YOU ARE: THANKS from us, the Stampers. We are dying to know who you are and really like our presents. We hope you do not think we are destitute. I am resigned to the fact that I will never know who you are. And I am grateful for generosity and love from people we know. I guess it is good I, yet again, am aware of my complete lack of control about surprises.

*and because I promised, here is stuff about T's present-- It was the movie Hollywood Homicide. It stars Harrison Ford and Josh Hartnett. Neither of us had seen it. There are a few potential reasons it was given to T:

1. It is an action movie. They figured Todd is a guy and will love an action movie.

2. It is awful and hilarious (like Ultraviolet, Bandidas and AeonFlux) and they knew we would watch it and love it and laugh our heads off.

3. They know about T's secret crush on Josh Hartnett. (Just kidding about that one)

Whichever it is, you can bet we'll be watching Hollywood Homicide instead of The Christmas Story for many years to come.

Thank you for a new Christmas tradition!

the "Year of the Year" award goes to:

So, W officially has an ornament for the tree. Not quite sure which photograph I like better of it. T and I are trying to keep our tree classy. Not completely sure why this is, because one W is 5 or so and starting making ornaments, we will cherish them and keep them safe and put them up every year. I know this because my mom STILL has a paper christmas tree I made for my sister in 1993. I put it on the tree this year. And we're definitely not the type of people that do two trees... you know, the "pretty one" and the family one?
2008 was a big year. To put it in better words than I ever could, here's M's words, "2008, you were quite a year.... i miss you already- as you'll always be the year i became a mom for the first time...and thus really found my heart..."
Yes, W is 2008 for me. Always will be. There have been other great things, but he is my 2008. (Which of course is so aptly illustrated above. ahhahahahahah!)

age is relative adjustments

So, I've gotten a few comments and requests about my "25 is the new 18" project. If you would like to participate, please include a way for me to contact you in your comment, email addresses would be great. Or you could always send me an email directly at alishastamper@gmail.com. If you were 25 at any point between April 2008 and April 2009, this project is for you!

editing html..... gr......gr.....

so, i think of myself as a fairly smart person. i can learn relatively quickly (if it is a not too "heady" subject, like biology. though the gospel is somewhat "heady", in terms of being something you have to visualize and there are not (and are in lots of cases), methods that can visually be rendering for teaching.

so i guess i really should be saying that i am an incredibly visual person.

with that said, HTML code does not come easy to me... and i have been putting it off for a LONG time. but, there are some things you just have to do for yourself, like figuring out how big you want your pictures to actually be.... so i hunkered down and did that this last few days. i just don't want to do a bunch of posts that are not exactly how i want them. it is slightly depressing.

BUT, to tide the concern that i am really not photographing and this is all a ruse, here is a present: they are the favors from my sister's wedding this past weekend. individual little paintings to go with the theme, "love is art." SWEET

old boxes

I'm home at my parents for the holidays and my sister's wedding. I am determined to put some things in order and also take things back to utah... since it doesn't look like I will be on the east coast again in the next year. The box I went through today surprised me. It was full of love letters from the camp I worked at from 2004-2006--Independent Lake Camp. I ran the photography section of the art program there. I ran the darkroom, taught the classes, trained the teachers. It was one of the best experiences in my life, both photographically and personally. We would write love letters in the camp twice a summer, something Art Amy had come up with years before. I sent some out this year, to family and friends. It is a great tradition. I celebrate it at the end of the summer. Maybe you should, too?

and p.s. i used to quilt a bit. i made 3 or 4 large ones and a baby one. I might make a blanket while i am here.

Not to be a tease, but I have been photographing so much I have not been online at all. I promise this will change eventually. Like on Dec. 17 or 18.

motivation

If you are really good and, more importantly, dedicated, you will not go undiscovered. You do not need a jury, they need you. Do it the old fashioned way, if you truly believe you have something unique to offer; go knock on doors. Who are these self-appointed experts sitting in judgement of your work for a fee? The people that matter, charge nothing. Take your work to the museum curators and directors if you feel your work is worthy of their time. I did it, and sat with Steichen at MOMA when I was eighteen. However, in my opinion, sending CD's and money is not the way to establish or enhance a career in photography.--Merg Ross (found 3/8/09)